From Lassie
Tall Two Leg Female can’t write today, because she is busy arranging for my very special birthday party. If it is anywhere around Is It Time for Dinner Yet? time, then I am getting the attention that I so deserve as you read this. I am sorry that Tall Two Leg Female and Tall Two Leg Fuzz Face Male did not ask all of you. I do not understand why not. I think you should be here to rub my belly.
Here is what I sent out the Two Legs I was allowed to invite:
Dear Two Leg:
Please don’t tell anyone I’m writing this but I turn fifteen years old on December 7th. I think everyone should come and pay attention to ME that day but Tall Two Leg Female and Tall Two Leg Fuzz Face Male are leaving AGAIN that weekend and I think they’d better be here to keep Willie in his place.
I want you to come and rub my belly and tell me how pretty I still am, and give me treats and everything. Tall Two Leg Female said you could do that on Saturday December 13th at 2:30. She said she’d have snacks and drinks and no one needs to bring anything except I am hoping you will bring your undying admiration for ME. It would be fine if you brought your REAL animals (the ones with muzzles who are able to smell things and have the right amount of legs for cowpies’ sake) if you wouldn’t mind leaving them in the car for the party so that I can be the CENTER OF ATTENTION, as I should, and then we could all go on a walk up the hill together if you would like that. Just as long as the REAL animals are nice to me, because I am deaf and getting fragile but am ever-so pretty still…
If you could write me back on this clicky-clacky thing then I’ll know how many of you are coming. Please let me know by at least 5 dark times before the party.
Lassie
Tall Two Leg Female says she already sent this flat thing that is me but isn’t me to you, but I asked her to send it again because it shows how very beautiful I am even though I am 15 years old now:
December 13th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
Lassie is very beautiful. No “still” about it. Sending a virtual belly rubbing for birthday celebration! Also, what a “fuzzle the buzzle” which involves vigorous rubbing of the ruff of the neck.
December 13th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Happy Birthday Lassie! You are *still* model material, plus experience which makes you more than model material.
December 13th, 2008 at 1:45 pm
Happy Birthday Lassie – you look BEAUTIFUL!!
December 13th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Happy Belated Birthday to the Loveliest Border Collie in the world! May attention and chicken rain down on you today.
December 13th, 2008 at 3:24 pm
Lassie, Just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. Sassy is Lassie’s daughter. Seems like it was just yesterday that I was there looking at that litter of pups. Hard to believe that it has been almost ten years!Thanks for blessing me with a special dog. Happy howlidays to you and yours!
December 13th, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Girlfriend, I feel your pain. The Two Legs just don’t fully appreciate the greatness that we are, or else they would not need to be reminded that we deserve nothing less than 24/7 admiration.
Love,
Allie, Golden Retriever Extraordinaire
December 13th, 2008 at 9:47 pm
Oh Miss Lassie! You are the undisputed Queen of Dogdom! The honor of being in your gracious presence must be more than some mere two-leggers could bear. Don’t be TOO dazzling or they will have fits on the ground and that is never very attractive.
Happy Birthday, and tell your personal no-face-fur Two Legs that I checked out a copy of “The Other End of the Leash” and am anxious to read it. Thank her, please, for having such a nice, friendly, and interesting blog.
Best of All Treats and Other Good Things on your special day!
*bows her way out of the room*
December 13th, 2008 at 10:09 pm
That is very insightful, Lassie. And yes you are very very pretty.
December 14th, 2008 at 10:14 am
Happy Birthday Lassie! Hope you have a great party and it’s all about YOU all day today!
December 15th, 2008 at 9:22 am
This is my first time visiting you. I found my way here via the author website of Edgar Sawtelle. I am captivated by his novel.
A very Happy Birthday to your gorgeous Lassie. Such a beautiful girl!
Now the owner of a Scottish Terrier and Cockapoo, I’ve been a huge dog lover all my life and I’m very happy to have found your blog. My next stop is to Amazon to get The Other End of the Leash and For the Love of Dog.
I’m adding you to my favorites, so I’ll be able to come back here and visit often.
December 17th, 2008 at 9:42 am
Lassie asked me (I’m in DC about to go on Diane Rehm’s show) to thank you all. She loved her party and your comments, but now she’s all frowny face (one of Lassie’s skills) because I’m gone. She’s also the most sensitive dog I’ve ever had, at least to my emotions. Her nick name should be “Trisha’s Mood Ring,” and I’m worried because I got all sad and upset the night before I left, crying on Jim’s shoulder Waaa Waaa Waaa, and the next morning Lassie urinated in the dining room. So, is her bladder infection back? (She’s fought them for years, been great for the last year). Was she just anxious because I left town and/or was upset the night before? Or did she just not empty her bladder earlier in the morning because she was too darn cold (it was zero and windy. geeeez.)?
The good news is that there’ve been no more accidents in the house since I left, I’ll be home tonight (and I’m not all upset anymore…). Silly Lassie, I’ll be home soon, and I know that Jim gave you an extra long belly rub last night. AND.. this is my last trip out of town til February! YEAH!
December 18th, 2008 at 12:09 am
Hello Lassie,
Happy belated birthday, and I hope I look as fine as you do when I turn 15. My human was out of town on my birthday too. We had a belated and joint celebration a few weeks later. My friend Vic has a birthday on 5/5 (which is also Boy’s day in Japan and Cinco de Mayo), and the humans decided to go with a “Cinco de Victor” theme complete with this goofy hat (Sombrero, is what the humans were saying) and balloons. I hope the “2 leggeds” didn’t make you wear any hats… they are soooo undignified, but I do admit it is fun watching the humans try and get us to wear them (and knocking them off as soon as they reach for those picture taking things). The humans did get us a nice peanut butter/oatmeal cake with yogurt icing; Yummy! The humans didn’t want any, something about it not having any sugar and no chocolate, (apparently not for their liking), thus it was all for me and my friends.
My human and I are enroute to FL and on the drive down listened we listened to your human on the Diane Rehm show. I think my human would have liked it if the show lasted more than an hour. We hope Diane invites Trisha back soon and for the full two hours. We much rather hear about dogs and understanding animal behavior rather than all the “bad behaviors” of the politicians and those wall street guys.